Monday, October 27, 2008


So I finally decided to get a haircut up here in Illinois. I went to a place called Mastercuts, which I went to on a previous visit, and received the worst haircut of my life. I told the lady (not going to call her a barber) that I wanted the sides to be buzzed, and then to have the top tripped so that it did not stick up, a little less than what was taken off of the sides. She responded by trimming the top to less than 1 inch. Once she started, I couldn't really say anything because there wasn't much that could be done to make it longer.
Once she finished, she stepped back, and looked up for the first time, stopped talking, and held her breath.....she had one of those "oh sh!+" moments. She then said "wow, you look like a different person, it's sticking up a little." Yeah.......a little? At this point, my head looked almost completely round, and very pokey. There was a guy waiting to get a haircut who was looking at me, with a very worried look on his face. I think he was about to leave, but another haircutter walked in, and that relaxed him. Even when he was getting his hair cut, he kept looking over at me in amazement and horror.
The lady then went to fix her scissors, and tighten them because they weren't working properly. I guess that was the reason for the haircut...darn scissors! When she returned, she began to frantically snip and re-trim my hair to try and make it look a little better. To her credit, what you see in the picture is about 10 times less crappy than the original haircut. Not that it's good or better, just not as horrible. (If you were swimming in a pool, and 10 people took a dump in it, and the filtration system took out the poop from 9 of those people so that the water only had a slight brownish hue to it, it'd still be crappy water. Not good water, not better water, just less crappy.) I still paid for it, because I figure that everyone has their bad days, and I didn't want to get her in trouble (she was an old grandma lady, and at the time I just felt really bad for her.......on second thought, I shouldn't have paid), but it doesn't mean I'm not going to complain a whole bunch about it.
Anyway, in honor of the haircutting proficiency of the folks at Mastercuts, I am posting a list of the positives about my new haircut:

1. I wanted my head to look smaller anyway
2. I wanted to look more asian for halloween
3. People say I haven't changed my haircut since highschool, and now I have!
4. Now I can rob a bank and no one will recognize me
5. Save money on shampoo
6. I don't have to worry about head lice anymore
7. I was getting tired of liking the way I looked
8. I needed something to blog about
9. People here kept telling me that I looked like Bobby Lee from Mad TV (maybe because we're both asian), and I wanted look different.
10. Lauren and I are already married, so looks don't count anymore

Please comment, and let me know what you think, and if you can think of any better positives! Sorry this is so bitter, I just had to get it out of my system, and maybe we can all have a laugh about it.


Anonymous said...

is there a Sports Clip in your area?

not a bad place to go for hair cuts. ESPN on the whole time... it's a place for guys...

chou said...

Mike! You could grow a mullet . . . or a faux-hawk! :) My HS boyfriend used to say the difference between a good haircut and a bad one is two weeks, hopefully that's the case if you ever get one of these again. :)

genkitummy said...

So, just fyi, Mike likes to make up random nicknames for me (which I sometimes find irritating). I started calling him "Ling Ling" (it sounds like a Chinese panda name) b/c of his new haircut. (He doesn't like that name).

Erika said...

Well, at least people can't see that is actually looked WORSE in person than on the post pics... just kidding! I think chou is right, you'll be looking like your old self in no time.

Keane said...

I dig it. It kind of makes you look like a cross between Brent and Billy (which may not be such a stretch since you're all related and they have short hair). The main drawback I can see to your new coiff is that it's coming up on winter, and if you ever wanted long hair, now would be the time!

genkitummy said...

Update-Luckily Mike's hair grows back fast, so it looks okay now. Errr...well like his normal hair. kind of poofy.

Keane-When Mike and I were dating I told him jokingly that I like long hair and he should grow it out like Harry Potter. Long story short, Mike thought that I was serious and didn't cut his hair for almost 3 months. My grandpa and dad used to make fun of his long hair. We laugh about it now, but I don't think he's going to be growing it out in the near future.